I almost never address feminism. Starting around 2011, half the PUA community suddenly became the ‘he-man woman haters’ club, and I just don’t understand it. We are here to get girls… by making girls happy by providing them what they want deep-down.
TRUTH: When it comes down to it, we are only successful with women because we are giving women what they ‘deep-down’ want. If they didn’t want/like it, it wouldn’t work. We are not manipulating women. We are not tricking women. We are not forcing them. All we are doing is showing ourselves to be the closest measure to what they are ‘deep-down’ looking for, and allowing them to ‘make the decision’ (all the more because we ‘burden push’).
Thus, ALL our hard work is actually a tremendously valuable thing for women. It’s as if the magic ‘supermodel’ body pill had been invented and every woman was suddenly more attractive. Men are becoming more attractive to women, and the average woman is getting a better guy. Other than this sudden anti-feminist movement that has started, its been pretty positive for women.
There is something I call The Grand Dynamic – it basically states that, in ANY social situation, when one person willingly accepts another person as more dominant than them, the person who submitted generally MUST be provided in return some emotional payment — a doggie treat for being deferring. “You’re such a hard worker Jon, thanks for staying late!” “Ahhh, you’re the nicest guy ever Chris!” If a guy willingly lowers himself to another guy, the higher guy will now be more friendly to him — but also have power. If he doesn’t lower himself, he doesn’t get friendliness… there is the normal competition and tension. If neither submits, and one person is giving too many emotional payments, then it is perceived the one giving must in fact be submissive and looking for approval (and thus deferring to their opinion authority).
The Grand Dynamic is a trade – people who submit and defer to others’ opinion authority receive acceptance, appreciation, love, or friendship in return. (all of these are labelled ‘heat’) This allows the submitting person to feel good about submitting. Power is traded for good emotions.
If a person does NOT submit, they CANNOT continue to receive more than just a minimal amount of these good emotions, otherwise it is implied the other person is lower. This is why you will often not seeing guys giving each other too many of these emotional payments… it either implies you are submitting to them, or it implies that you are assuming they are submitting to you. Either one will cause conflict. Men must have a mutual respect for each other… we don’t take too kindly to being placed lower to other men.
Neither gender can control what the other gender is attracted to. If so, men would be fighting to find the girl that could eat the most Ben & Jerry’s, and women would be wanting a guy that could play Call of Duty for 3 days straight in his underwear. But in the real world, men like women who are physically attractive, and women like men who have social power and dominance.
So when a guy lowers himself to a girl, even though she might APPEAR to like him, she is actually only giving him the required emotional payments she must give him for his submission — ‘ohhhh, I love it, you are SO thoughtful, you are the perfect guy!’. That’s really all that the friend zone is… he is submissive and defers to her, doesn’t have an opinion of his own, and she rewards him for his submission and compliance. She is firmly in authority, ultimately decides what will and will not happen, and the guy is either a follower or cut off. She would never date the guy, because she wants a guy with dominance and power.
The opposite is the ‘perfect relationship’ (for 85-90% of women). He is in control, he leads and makes decisions and his judgment is final, but he is overwhelmingly passionate for her, appreciates her infinitely, and values her beyond this world. These are all intense emotional payments for her deferring to his authority. As SOON as she stops submitting, the payments must be cut off — if you continue to give payments to a defying person (guy, girl, co-worker, client, or child), then you are in fact submitting to them. It’s called supplication. Both that and getting mad at them for defying are bad. You can never attempt to force submission… it is a decision they make, and when they do and they come to you, they start getting intense emotional rewards for it. Instead of the ‘carrot and the stick’, think ‘carrot and the yawn’ — you reward compliance, and get quickly bored and wander away from defiance (never punish it).
How does this relate to feminism? Because feminists want to be dominant like men, but to still receive all the emotional payments that the typical female expects to get simply because she is female. But that is against the rules of social power, of any type. You can only have one or the other… dominance, or emotional payments… otherwise you are expecting others to be BOTH lower than you, AND to provide you appreciation and love. Emotional payments go DOWN the dominance ladder, not up it. If you want good feelings, you must submit. If you want power, you must be willing to go without.
Of course, feminists simply rationalize that they aren’t receiving emotional payments from men anymore because men are ‘resentful’ a woman is in power. The truth is, we could care less. We are used to it… there are women in power everywhere now, we are used to it it doesn’t bother. But now that you are acting dominant, you are officially in the ‘man’-world, and so you get treated like a man. And men tend to be assholes to each other. We generally don’t care about each others feelings.
So it’s a cycle… feminists become more dominant, interpret that they are being resented for it, and thus think that that’s all the more reason women are discriminated against. You’re actually not being discriminated against… actually, you are being treated this way BECAUSE we are seeing you like a man, seeing you as an equal and a competitor for dominance. Men treat each other pretty cold and callously. In fact, if we were to go out of our way to be nice to you, to care about your feelings, we would be treating you like LESS of a man, because men don’t treat each other that way. To treat a feminist even more like a man, I would say ‘get over it and stop fucking crying’… that’s exactly how a man would treat another man.
As far as relationships are concerned, men tend to not want to date feminist women. But it’s not their fault. For thousands of years, and to this day, women secretly desire (and clearly respond to sexually) men that are more dominant than them. Men that were submissive were rejected and didn’t pass on their genes.
Just as women tend to be disgusted by and would never date a man that what submissive to them (although their ego would like it and they would accept him as a friend), so to are men programmed to genuinely want and appreciate feminine, strong but eventually submissive woman. It is not contrived, it’s not a manipulative game to keep women below them. Men just so happen to FULLY appreciate in women the very same things that women fully detest in men. When a man sees a girl he just started dating and is on the fence about ironing his shirt or doing his laundry, he generally becomes more sexually attracted to her and truly starts to love her for it — and the girl can feel this appreciation and desire. But if a guy a girl was on the fence about did the same thing, the girl would say ‘ahhhh thank you, you’re the BEST EVER’ in that fake-nicey way (giving the required emotional payment), but she wouldn’t become more sexually attracted. In fact, she might even become repulsed, depending on how submissive she already viewed him. Side note: the way to recover from that is to reject her nicey emotional payment and do something that re-establishes dominance and opinion authority, such as responding ‘ohhhh shut up Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
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In summary, there is things in life we can control, and things we can’t. We can’t control what the opposite gender is attracted to, and we can’t control the rules of social interaction… ie we can’t make someone submit to us AND provide us emotional payments. As the point was made here, the issue with feminism is that it ignores these rules, asking for their cake and to eat it too (to be treated like a man, but to still be treated warmly)… or in the case of attraction, desiring non-dominant qualities in men that the vast majority of the female population absolutely cannot stand. Men are just playing the game that they have been given, responding to what they know works, and playing by the normal rules of social interaction.
Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.
Image may be NSFW.Clik here to view.
